In the area of language, syntax, diction, and style there is marked improvement from the beginning assignment to the ones near the end. The syntax of the profile assignment is characterized by an overabundance of sentences that begin with dependent clauses and followed by the main clause. For example, “Being very successful in the business field at this very young age, he always appears with a bright smile and casual but professional attitude” (par. 2).
This is an acceptable structure, but more variety in sentence length and type occurs in the second assignment, demonstrating a greater command of the language itself and more ease with creating a fluid and balanced type of prose. Another example of a less-than-perfectly structured sentence in the first assignment is in the use of a quote: “‘The importance of writing at work for me is critical,’ according to Brian” (par. 3). Here, the diction of the tag “according to Brian” creates a feeling of disjointedness.
The structure of quotes in the second piece, however, shows a better ability to smooth out the places in which portions of the text have been joined together. An example of a quote from the second assignment shows clearly my development as a writer: “while Kim’s reference to this information was overt, with a section of the resume entitled ‘personal information’ and including five points, Cox’s information was buried under ‘Licensed Real Estate Sales Person’ in a section entitled ‘Other’” (4-5).
The quotes contained in this sentence are more integrated into a seamless sentence, and this denotes a better ability to choose words that create that seamless quality. Another prime example of my improved writing skills can be seen in two sentences that convey differing levels of factual information. The first sentence demonstrates slightly more complex sentence structure but with muddled clauses that have the potential to become confusing: “Some experience shared by Brian will give students who are in Business field an understanding of how writing is used in the business world” (par. 2).
The sentence from the second assignment, on the other hand, reveals a heightened ability to detect the potential for confusion and to smooth out the construction of the sentence so as to promote more clarity: “Brian Cox is a master of international management with an emphasis in entrepreneurship, and accordingly, he has served as the founder of a corporation and as the chief executive officer of more than one company” (1).
Therefore, there was definite growth in the ability to structure and style sentences in order to facilitate the greatest level of understanding on the part of the audience. Throughout both the assignments, it was also possible to see development in the area of drawing conclusions from the data studied and analysed. It is most evident in the actual ceation of a resume, as it was possible to incorporate the things learned from the resume analysis. The resume included the salient things in which the audience (prospective employers) would be interested.
There was evidence of research regarding the values that they would possess, and that research included the previous resume analysis. In addition, the phrases used in the resume were appropriately concise, including no pronoun references. In fact, as learned from resume analysis, “very few full sentences were used […]; the phrases were spare, containing only the words necessary to get the meaning across clearly. ” As a result, the headings are properly labeled and bolded to facilitate an easier view of and access to information.
This is also an improvement on the first assignment, which (as mentioned before) was a little lacking in the area of structure and organization. Familiarity with genres gives a writer greater ability to assess the efficacy of documents written in the said genre. In addition to this, learning about and progressing in the ability to utilize the content, organizational, language, form and values model enables writers to produce more focused, structured, and crafted pieces of work.
In accordance with this, it was clear that the resume written at the end of the in-depth resume analysis reflected a deeper level of understanding with regard to all the levels of the writing process. While the early piece boasted merits, it suffered from such problems as awkward sentence structure and non-concrete organization. On the other hand, the later pieces showed a greater ability to organize content into well-structured sentences with focused outcomes and conclusions.
The information gained from this will serve to inform future writing endeavors, as it will urge me to continue moving in the direction that will take me to the optimal level writing in my field. The understanding of the writing process is very important in constructing a piece of high-quality work, and this analysis has helped me to focus on the most important aspects of writing in my field.
Nguyen, Anh-Thu. “Resume Analysis. ” San Diego State Univ. 2005. —. Modern Equation. San Diego State Univ. 2005.